I’ve got one client that micromanages his case such that he calls every single day. At least twice. Either he is trying to convince me of the correctness of his position or he is asking me for a loan. These are never personal calls.
Client: I just reviewed the motion and I want to talk about the relevant caselaw that they cited.
Me: Did you become a lawyer since the last time we talked?
Client: Namby, you know that I didn’t. Seriously, they rely totally on the Jones case and I believe that they opens them up to a variety of different arguments. I have found over twenty different cases that deal with the issue in my case. Two of them predate the case that they cite and in theory that…
Me: [Not listening]
Client: …this comes directly from the wise words of the Illinois Supreme Court. There is no way that the justice can be denied especially when they have indirectly admitted liability on the second issue of this case…
Me: [Still not listening]
Client…Finally, I want to direct your attention to the decisions of the Illinois Supreme Court in the Smith case and the non-controlling opinion of the Kentucky Appellate court…
Me: Let me interrupt you right there, I have to actually run to court right now. Just write me a letter with all of this material in it.
Client: I’ll just give you a call later and read you the material when you have more time.
Me: Please don’t.
This call was twenty-five minutes that I will never get back. And I didn’t pay attention to half of what was said.