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This is a cry for help

Lawyering under the Influence of DayQuil

I wish I could say that I’ve played hooky from the office due to the reelection of the President…but sadly I cannot. I’ve had the flu (or flu like symptoms) all week. Until today, my week has been an exciting combination of napping on the couch, napping in bed and moving between the couch and the bed. Exciting stuff, I know.

Finally feeling better, I made the choice of trying to head back to work today. Let me say that while I feel better than I have since Sunday, my head is presently drifting through the clouds in a semi-permanent zoned out state. When I’ve been sick in the past, I have been able to time my triumphant return when there is absolutely nothing going on at the office.

Not so this time.

I’m sitting in a courtroom at the moment hoping that I (a) don’t fall asleep or drool on myself, (b) remember my name and who my client is and (c) can respond to the judge without giving her the deer in headlights look when asked my name and the name of my client. I am not sure I could pass a field sobriety test at the moment (Damn you DayQuil). My thoughts feel itchy and my brain seems to be sloshing around my skull as if it is a free floating mass. If I’m not careful, I’m going to end up getting the lawyering equivalent of a DUI. Which I am fairly certain is a contempt citation.

“Good morning your honor, my name is…uh…my name is…shit…I should know this…”

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About thenambypamby

Lawyer in Chicago. I blog, I tweet, I try to stay anonymous.


2 thoughts on “Lawyering under the Influence of DayQuil

  1. Hahaha! This sounds a lot like me. This morning I had to appear in front of our own version of Judge Judy. (She has a reputation of screaming at anybody and everybody.) I kept on having coughing fits so I had to step out of the courtroom multiple times. At one point, I was coughing so much that I had tears in my eyes. A courtroom advocate saw me and she asked: “Did she do that to you?” referring to Judge Judy.

    Posted by Katy | November 9, 2012, 7:27 pm
  2. Yes, yes… for the record, DayQuil should be avoided when operating heavy machinery or the law. First time reader. Awesomeness.

    Posted by lawinsider | November 11, 2012, 12:18 pm

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